Jessica's Way: July 6, 2013

Jessica:  July 6, 2013

We were all up at Jeff’s family’s lake home for the fourth of July weekend—Sarah, Megan, Trent (Megan’s guy of the moment), Jeff and I. Alli had to work on the weekend at the hospital, so she and Thor left by noon on Friday. I was surprised when Thor came back up to the lake this morning though. I thought he and Alli were going to have a quiet weekend together. That’s what he had told Jeff when he left. I guess he changed his mind.

I didn’t realize that Thor and Alli had a fight until he corners me on the end of the dock.

“She hasn’t even told her parents about me,” he says, sitting down next to me on the bench. “I’m a decent looking guy. I’m going to grad school. Am I that much of a loser that her parents wouldn’t approve?”

I can’t help but laugh. He is indecently fine looking sitting next to me without his shirt. I know that he’s Jeff’s best friend, but still. That isn’t why I am laughing though. He obviously has no clue what Alli’s parents were like or he would never want to meet them. “Trust me, you don’t want them to know you exist.”

“What does that mean?”

I’m not sure if I should go into detail, but I think he deserves to know what he is in for if he wants a relationship with Alli. “Her parents are a bit overbearing. It is not worth meeting them if this is just going to be a summer thing.”

His brow furrows and his eyes squint as he glares at me. What did I say?

“Suppose they found out about me, what would happen?”

“They would very politely invite you out for dinner at the club, where they would interrogate you endlessly about your career plans and religious beliefs. And when you didn’t measure up, they would condemn you. Not because you’re a bad person, but because no one, not even themselves, can meet their standards. Then they would pinpoint your flaws and make sure that Alli was aware of each and every one of them, tenfold.” I pause hoping that helps clarify it for him. His scowl tells me I need to add more. “When I first met her mom, she tried to convince Alli that I wasn’t good friend material because my parents were going through a divorce and I was going to suck Alli dry with my emotional neediness. That was her conclusion though she had talked to me for no more than ten minutes. With guys, it’s worse. If you think Alli’s type-A personality is high strung now just wait and see what she’s like when her parents get all riled up.”

He looks out over the water following a speedboat with his eyes as it loops around the edge of the lake. “We’ve never even talked about religious differences.”

“I’m not trying to turn you off from Alli. She’s not like her folks. She views the world around her without blinders and can see outside the box. It’s just best to not stir the pot with her parents.”

“I thought she was Catholic. She went to a Catholic high school.”

“Her Nana is Catholic. But her parents joined a non-denominational church when Alli was in her teens. It’s a little extreme. I think it turned Alli off to all organized religions. You should probably talk to her about it. But I know for me with my mom’s crazy family, no one ever listens to anyone else with an open mind, so I’ve learned not to discuss religion or politics if I can help it. It just leaves me frustrated when I do. Alli probably feels the same way with her parents. It’s easier to let them assume she agrees with them. If she doesn’t make waves then she can live her life in peace.”

I could see the cogs of Thor’s brain turning in his expression. I hope I didn’t say anything wrong. I just wanted to help. He seemed so dejected, and he doesn’t deserve the psychological torture that Alli’s parents inflict. Sometimes Alli doesn’t realize that her parents don’t just affect her. They affect everyone she touches.

I hear the clomping of flip-flops against the wooden slats of the dock and I look back to see Jeff and the rest of the gang coming toward us in their swimsuits. I don’t know what else to say to Thor. I rise as Jeff spins the oversized wheel of the boatlift, clinking with each turn, to lower the boat. We’re going skiing and I still need to get my suit on before the boat leaves without me. I touch Thor’s shoulder and ask, “Are you OK?”

He nods and I know that is all I will get now that everyone else is on the dock. I squeeze past the group and hustle inside to get changed. Thor has to figure the rest out on his own. Alli is right to keep him away from her parents. I hope he understands.

Copyright 2014 Susan Schussler