Thor had packed a picnic for dinner and we eat it on the beach—Thai chicken salad, with broccoli and red peppers. He says he made it, but I suspect that his brother who’s a chef made it. It tastes great. He pulls out wine and we drink it out of plastic cups as we try to hide the fact that we are drinking on a public beach.
After eating we stroll around Lake Calhoun. He keeps playfully bumping into me as we walk. When we stop to view the Minneapolis skyline—the lowering sun painting the mirrored buildings orange and red—he wraps his arms around me and pulls me against him. His breath in my ear matches mine as if we were singing a round of silent melody. As my lungs fill, his empty. Then mine empty and his fill.
We stand in silence as bikers and joggers buzz by. His words, usually so free-flowing, seem noticeably absent. I wonder what he’s thinking. Did he take his ex-fiancé here on a similar date? Is he thinking of her? Or is he thinking of last week when we went to the same coffee shop to watch a different band? I’m not sure, but he seems a bit distant. I pull him back onto the path and say, “Come on. We’re going to miss the band.” The sun won’t set until almost 9:30, but we still have to make it halfway around the lake to the coffee shop in uptown before all the tables are taken. Last week it was so packed that we had to sit around the corner from the main room and we couldn’t even see the band. “We’re not going to get a table,” I say, just to get him back on task. He smiles and follows me.
By the time we get to the coffee shop, there are people lined up against the back wall and I can’t see any open tables, not even around the corner where we sat last time. Thor pushes our way through the standing room only crowd like he owns the place and I’m thinking that he’s crazy for even trying until I see his brother. Grayson is sitting next to some girl that I know I’ve never seen before, and we slide into the booth across from them.
“Hey, Red,” says Grayson with Thor’s smile.
I didn’t notice it before but they have the same smile. I’m not really fond of the name Red, but I’ve heard it so many times that I ignore it. I return the smile and he introduces his blonde beauty of the moment. Camryn or Kya, I don’t remember. It doesn’t matter because I’ll never see her again. I wonder whether or not Thor will become more like his brother and have a different girl on his arm every week after we break up. On looks alone, he could pull it off, but I don’t think his heart would be in it. He’s not that shallow.
Thor sits for the obligatory introductions and then excuses himself to stand in line for our coffees. I know we will break up. After my meeting with Dr. Albright last week, I know I won’t have time for anything but school once it starts. Part of me is sad about that, but my rational side knows there is no other way. I refuse to be one of those girls who gets sidetracked by a man. I’m going to be a doctor, damn it. And no gorgeous smiling hard body is going to distract me from my career.
“How was the honeymoon?” Grayson asks glancing at me and then to the girl hanging on his every word. She giggles and I’m not sure if it is because she knows the story about me going on Thor’s honeymoon with him after he broke it off with his cheating fiancé or if it’s because Grayson is paying attention to her.
I don’t think his question is the most appropriate thing to say, but I answer anyway. “Satisfying.” I surprise both of us with my answer. Grayson’s eyebrows jolt up in astonishment. I am trying to knock him down to a manageable ego. It doesn’t work, though. It just spurs him on.
“It’s good to know my brother is capable of keeping up the family’s reputation,” says Grayson, his expression indicates he’s patting himself on the back for his cleverness. “I wasn’t sure you would stick around after the free vacation, but here you are.”
Irritated by his declaration I say, “I guess it must be your brother’s skills.” I scowl at him, trying to show him how inappropriate the conversation is.
He stares at me for several seconds as if he’s trying to figure me out and then adds, “Don’t hurt him. Break it off now, if you’re not going to stay with him. He doesn’t need his heart shredded again. He gets attached, obsessed almost. I can see it starting with you. If you’re not in it for the long hall, don’t string him along.”
My face must show him all he needs to know because he says, “Yeah. That’s what I thought. Break it off.”
I look over at Thor as he nears the barista’s counter. His eyes meet mine and that devilish smile spreads across his face. Was he getting too attached to me? We had only been together a few weeks. I like being with him. I really like him. He’s a better distraction than I could have ever hoped for, but he is supposed to just be a summer fling—someone to make the time pass until school starts again, nothing more. I meant to tell him on the flight home that I wouldn’t be able to see him after school starts. It isn’t that I’m avoiding the subject. It’s just never the right time.
I look back over to Grayson. I hate it when people tell me what to do. I get enough of that from my parents. “Why would I do that? I like Thor. I’m sure he only sees me as a rebound anyway, someone to help get him over his cheating fiancé.”
Cora, or whatever her name is, has her phone out and is texting now. I guess she’s tired of being left out of the conversation. Grayson pulls his arm from behind her and leans over the table, talking directly at me in a hushed tone. “You better not hurt him.”
Why do people keep saying that? He’s not some fragile child. He’s the one who asked me on the trip. He was in control the whole time. “I don’t have a red room of pain,” I say and the girl next to him giggles, catching the Fifty Shades reference. “Your brother is stronger than you think. Why do you think I’m going to hurt him?”
“He is obviously more into you than you are to him.”
I shake my head. Grayson doesn’t know what he is talking about. Thor isn’t needy or clingy. It’s not like we even talk or text every day. We’re just taking it one day at a time. Aren’t we?
Thor slides into his seat next to me and rests his arm on the back of the booth behind me. “What did I miss?” he asks, pushing my iced latte toward me.
I shrug not sure what to say. Then the girl next to Grayson says, “Your honeymoon.” She doesn’t even look up from her phone. Her fingers are moving, quickly typing out a text.
In a fatherly tone, Grayson says, “Cara.” Her name must be Cara. I’m surprised he remembered it.
“What? She said that he satisfied her.” She looks up and meets Grayson’s glare. “It wasn’t anything bad.”
“Bro, did you really ask Allison if I…” The words catch in Thor’s throat. He gapes at his brother in disbelief.
Grayson laughs and answers, “She offered it freely. It’s good to know you can play ball with the rest of us. She also told us that she didn’t have a red room of pain, but I suspect that’s a lie. It’s always the quiet ones who go over the edge.”
Oh my god. I am completely mortified. Grayson definitely won this match. Thor looks over at me for confirmation and I’m sure that my skin matches my hair—bright red. Just then the band starts to introduce themselves. Thor’s expressions says he wants to hear more about our conversation. I don’t think he really wants to know the rest of our discussion. Grayson is crazy. Thor is cautious. He’s not going into this blindfolded. On our trip, he told me that he would probably never marry. What does that say to a girl? Besides, it’s not even the Fourth of July yet. I have two months before summer’s end. The band starts up before anyone says anymore and it is so loud in the small space that we can no longer talk. Thor’s fingers find my bare shoulder and I know that I’ve made the right choice to wait. I didn’t even know him a month ago—who knows what will happen by the end of summer. Copyright 2014 Susan Schussler
